Sunday, December 23, 2012

Year in review

I looked at this blog and realized I have not written since August. I now recognize, it is because I have so many other forms of processing with people these days that my blog has not been the necessary outlet it once was. Still, I am feeling extremely reflective this Christmas and want to write about our past year. 2012 has been one of the best years of our marriage and one of the best years of my life. I have been given the gift of spiritual oneship with my husband as well as a church family that we have only begun to get to know but are learning to love. It is most important that I count the many blessings we have had. In April of this year Kyle went to very part time hours at LL and began establishing his own work. We have had minimal income and yet have been taken care of beyond the basics, we have even had excess. My placenta business along with Kyle's business gave us enough to cover our bills monthly. At the beginning of most months we would ask ourselves and each other "where is the money going to come from this month?" and we always had it. We have learned the excitement of trusting God and have come to know Him on a new level because of our desperate reliance on his provision. It has been a joyful bumpy ride. There have been down days, and there have been days of fear and frustration, Through it all, I know, Kyle and I have been drawn together with Jesus leading us forward. I am so proud of the man my husband is. He has opened himself up in ways I did not know were possible. He is letting go of pride and embracing humility and I see Jesus in him. His wisdom inspires me and his love frees me. Wonderful people have loved me so well this year. New friends, and old, have talked, cried, prayed, laughed and listened as I started to let go of myself and began to understand what my identity as God's beloved looks like. I am no where near complete but my understanding of what it means to be a part of the People of God has been birthed. I have said to a few people that I have been able to begin giving out of overflow instead of duty because I feel poured into. By that, I mean, time with friends has been time with God..and there were are MANY moments with people this year where I walked away and breathed a refreshed sigh because I was in beautiful company in God's midst. I am thankful. The Meyers story is continuing to unfold. I feel the stirrings of purpose in my heart. As I have received I want to give. I do not know what that means but a desire to Love as I am Loved is forming. No longer do I live by an ideal or a dogma, rather I live as one loved by God. This changes EVERYTHING for me. God is so good, his love endures forever and it is for all people. "Jesus use me as you have used so many people in my life this year. May I be a part of your story".

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