Year in Review 2013

I woke with an itch to write, to put into words what on most days is just feeling. My life is amazing, beautiful and hopeful. This year, in April, Kyle quit working at LL and we have spent our time and energy building into our life together. Restorative Peacemaking has become an identity for Kyle and I, and God continues to grow us up in this thing. We began leading home groups at CV and each of the groups we were with this year were extreme blessings in our life. We LOVE our church family. We are becoming emotionally invested in God's work in that place and feel honored to call these people friends and family. With that said, life has been full of highs and lows. There were many months this year where we were ready to give up. The following cycle happened no less than four or five times...One or both of us would decide this instability is too hard, we would begin to crave control and that would be followed with a desperate search for an out, a job that is unrelated to anything we love, something to pay the bills. This would go on for about a week, one of us (usually Kyle) would finally say "what are we doing?! This is not what we want, who we are, and this is not what God is doing" At that point we would recommit to the hard road of unknown, have an increase in faith and have fresh perspective about what is actually happening around here. The point is, that we cannot and do not want to get away from what we believe in. Our hearts are for emotional health. We fight along side those who are committed to the hard work of honestly looking at themselves. God shows up in crazy ways when people engage Him and themselves with intense vulnerable honesty. To be present in that is an Honor, for people to invite Kyle and I into their true selves is humbling. Our life along side people, is a gift we do not deserve, and I am so thankful for Time. Time for relationships, time for each other and time with our children. We have been blessed beyond measure financially this year. Much of our support has come from family and friends who love us unconditionally. We know that their (your) sacrifice and pouring into our lives is the reason we are ending 2013 without debt, and each of our bills paid. It has been miraculous and again humbling. We enter 2014 after a year of being "pregnant" with Restorative Peacemaking, a year of watching as the Lord started shaping something specific. This next year will be a growing into and more of what is happening will reveal itself. It is time for us to include people in our Story, to let others partner in Restorative Peacemaking. To date, we have tried to carry the burden alone and have not always been honest when things were hard. Kyle and I both have been convicted about that. We want to be open about our failures, fears and inconsistencies. We will trust people with our own undoing as so many have trusted us with their own. "God help us to be vulnerable, help us to reach out and to trust others with our potential successes and inevitable failures". In all things this year I am ending 2013 with immense gratitude, gratitude that has made the month of December an extremely weepy month. I feel so present to God's goodness,kindness and grace that I will cry about ANYTHING. My tears have been joyful and the necessary release that I need in moments when I feel so very full.